Rosie Scribble

Burning ambition

I have a problem.

IJ has just started Year 2 and she is really happy. She loves her school and has the same teacher as last year. I am lucky.

It's a good school and she has a nice group of friends.

It was so lovely to see her this morning actually running in. It used to be so different. She used to cling to me and cry and make me feel terribly guilty for leaving her. And I know I'm not the only parent who has been through that. But now she is settled and she is happy.

But now I'm worried, which may sound odd. Because there are choices to be made, not immediate ones but maybe in about two years' time.

You see I want to return to work full time, and ideally I'd like to work in Marketing. I've worked in the corporate world and I'd like to go back there. I have a business degree and I'd like to use it. However, there are no jobs around here, and I mean none.

We live in a deprived area which is suffering even more in the middle of a recession, but even before that the job prospects here were severely limited. We haven't always lived here but for the time being this is where we find ourselves.

But I don't want this to be permanent. I want to move to any area I like where there jobs and opportunities, where there are good secondary schools, and where the town centre has at least one bookshop and a nice coffee shop. We don't have that here.

So for me to get a graduate job, or any job at all, means we have to leave.

What do you do when your child is settled but you are not, and you are driven and ambitious but find yourself trapped?

It's a difficult one.

What's occurring?

Something is going on.

Things are changing.

I need to take immediate action.

Let me explain...

On Friday I wandered into Marks and Spencer and purchased a very practical, sensible jumper and a very practical sensible black cardigan. Two in fact.

The day before that, when I saw a friend at the school gates looking freezing cold, the words, "Where's your coat?" escaped from my mouth before I even had a chance to stop them.

Then yesterday I found myself advising my Mum-to-be friend on the practicalities of buying baby clothes that were easily washable and pointing out the benefits of non-biological washing powder.

So having weighed up the evidence, I am concerned.

I am becoming too dull and being too sensible.I am having too many early nights on school nights, I am shopping in M&S, I am buying sensible clothes and I am giving practical advice.

There is only one thing for it.

I will have to dye my hair pink, hire a Harley Davidson and bag myself a rock star.

Otherwise, who knows where this is heading.

Me, Myself and I

IJ has been off school for the last two days with an ear infection, so I've been stuck in watching back-to-back episodes of Charlie and Lola.

Thankfully, my sanity is saved by Not Supermum, who has tagged me in a meme.

So here goes,

What are your current obsessions?

I'm obsessed with writing; I love it. I'm working on a fiction book for teenagers, 20,000 words completed so far, and write that at every opportunity. I also read teenage literature to keep up to date with the market, and I'm a particular fan of Chris Higgins (despite the fact I recently turned 36!). When I'm not writing I'm trying to do my proper job as a freelance editor and proofreader which I really enjoy. Some weeks I have lots of work, but others there is nothing. Then I do the housework. It's not a bad life.

What's for dinner tonight?

That reminds me, I must go to Sainsbury's. It'll probably be spinach and ricotta cannelloni.

What's the last thing you bought?

My brother got me some vouchers for HMV for my birthday recently. Amongst other things, I bought Dave Gorman in America Unchained DVD where he attempts to live in America without giving any money to the big brand names. I'm going to see him in concert at the Nottingham Arena next year so need to be up to date on his material!!

What are your favourite holiday spots?

Hawaii, the Bahamas and Necker Island.

No, not really, wishful thinking! I love the South of France, UK city breaks and I'd love to go back to America. We've 'done' Disney World, I've love to go back to the Florida Keys and one day I plan to go to New York.

What are you reading now?

Marion Keyes' latest book - The Charming Man.

 

Use four words to describe yourself.

Ambitious, determined, moody and analytical.

What is your guilty pleasure?

I can only have one? In that case it's probably Heat Magazine, nothing wrong with a bit of escapism once on a while.

What is your favourite film?

Has to be Slumdog.

Recently watched Little Miss Sunshine which was great. If I  had to watch a Disney film it would be Enchanted - quite brilliant!

If you could change anything about your life so far, what would it be?

I'd spend less time dwelling on the past and more time focusing on the future.

I won't tag anyone for this meme, you've probably all done it, but if you want to have a go, feel free!

They came, they sang, and they wore very little.

Last night Girls Aloud played Nottingham Arena.

They were simply amazing.

I went with Nic, Jo and Lucy - three single mums and a mum-to-be. We were out for a much-needed night out and we certainly had one (even though we found ourselves in the bar drinking nothing more alcoholic than coffee with thoughts of the morning school run in our minds. How life changes when you hit 30 and enter the world of parenting!")

Our seats in the 10,000-seater arena were actually really good. I had expected us to have little view of the stage but in fact we were very close to it. We all looked as closely as we could to find fault with Cheryl Cole - a spot, or a hair out of place - but found nothing. They were all perfect, and few people can carry off the tiny costumes they wore throughout most of the show!



They sang brilliantly and even produced their own version of Womanizer which put Britney's efforts to shame. They pole-danced (yes, really) and invited me to join them n stage (no, not really, I made the last part up.)

But they were, honestly, really good. Not the sort of show I would take my five-year-old daughter too but then Girls Aloud aren't really aiming themselves at the Cbeebies market.  It was good clean-ish fun, they weren't too thin, they really could sing, and they had attitude.


We matched home, strutting our stuff with a air of confidence we didn't have when we arrived.

Hey, we're girls, and we're aloud!

Grumpy Old Women

Recently I have noticed that I am becoming increasingly grumpy, and it's something that seems to becoming worse with age.

It isn't just that I'm becoming less patient; I've started to hear myself commenting out loud about the state of the world in a style that previously I only heard from my grandparents. Even my own parents don't seem to whinge like I do.

Today, on the school run, I commented on two young boys I saw walking to school eating crisps (that's hardly healthy, the poor teachers, they don't stand a chance). I tutted at a man I saw spitting in the street (disgusting) and another who ran with his children across the road before the green man had lit up (that's dangerous and won't teach them the Green Cross Code).

I also tutted when I saw a girl who attends the same secondary school that once did  wearing a thigh-length skirt and had pink hair (in my day neither of those would have been allowed, what's happened to uniform standards?)

I may need to join the team of the Grumpy Old Women because I am rapidly turning into one.