Over recent weeks we've graduated from the pink sparkly princess stage and we’ve now entered the Rock Chick stage, or at least IJ has, so she tells me.
Apparently this stage means embracing all things black and purple and using words like ‘random’ in conversation, rather randomly as it happens.
It also involves mimicking all things iCarly, which is a new addition to our weekly TV viewing.
It’s an interesting pre-teenage stage that takes a little getting used to and is guaranteed to leave any parent feeling slightly out of touch, but I quite like it. And it's nice to see a slightly more confident personality emerging in the little girl who previously wouldn't experiment with her hair or clothes.
There’s something quite therapeutic about de-cluttering and selecting those items that were once much loved but are now no longer needed.
We’re downsizing which has meant a weekend of going through boxes of toys and games and deciding which can be put into charity bags and which are long past their sell-by date.
Except there’s a very obvious change from the last time I de-cluttered our house.
At the moment the topic of conversation in our house is internet safety. IJ has discovered the joys of Moshi Monsters and Club Penguin and seems to think befriending complete strangers online is perfectly acceptable, so we’ve had to spend a great deal of time talking about it.
Before long we’ll be having similar conversations about alcohol. Although internet safety is a topic I’ve had to go out and read about, I'm all too aware of the dangers of alcohol. And as an uneducated child is a vulnerable one, I won’t be allowing IJ out in the big wide world without her knowing the facts about alcohol. I’d be putting her at risk otherwise.
Although they might not listen to us a lot of the time, Drinkaware has found that parents have the most influence on young children’s attitudes and behaviour towards alcohol. Given that the average age of a child's first drink is just under 14, it is essential that we talk to them before their friends have a greater level of influence, ideally before they start secondary school.
Even the most sensible child can be vulnerable as a result of alcohol. Help keep them safe and their friends safe. The results of not doing so can be devastating.
I have a confident, cheeky, happy eight-year-old daughter who beamed with pride as she stood in front of the whole school and demonstrated her spelling skills during her recent Year 4 assembly.
She’s growing up, changing, maturing and the teenage years are looming in front of us, approaching faster than I would like.
I don’t want to see that confidence undermined or eroded away. I don’t want her questioning her appearance, her size, her value in this world.
With the increasing number of advertisements targeting her as she grows older, I question how I can ever counteract the powerful messages they are sending out. Messages that are telling her she needs to be perfect when she’s exactly right as she is.
This video posted by Killers of Confidence looks at the messages being given out by the hundreds of advertisements that target young people and the effect they can have on their image and self-esteem.
Advertisements that tell girls they should be tall, skinny, tanned, pretty and rich. Advertisements that tell boys they should be tall, dark, handsome, tough, muscular and protective. Advertisements that promote perfection, as if it is achievable, as if it is the only thing that matters in life, as if our children need to change who they are and the people they are growing up to be.
The video is over a year old but the message is just as powerful, and just as necessary.
It takes confidence, determination, drive and a strong sense of self-belief to override these messages. It shouldn’t be that way. Let children be themselves and be whoever they want to be.