What every woman ought to know, apparently.

My mother has always said, I should behave more like a lady. So here from Constance Mortimer (er... real name Gavin), is What Every Woman Ought to Know, a self-help book with love and lifestyle tips from 1909 - 1910 aimed at introducing some decorum into the life of every modern girl and pitched as the ideal gift book for every discerning lady.

But actually, I'm not quite sure how I would feel about being given a gift like this, truth be told.

The book is described as "a fascinating compilation of considered counsel on relationships, etiquette, beauty, health, home-making, exercise and more, drawn from the problem pages of yesteryear's magazines".

While many of the extracts were interesting, at times highly entertaining and at other times clearly out-dated, I would not be sure what sort of message the giver of such a book would be giving out.

I enjoyed reading some of the recipes for combating grey hair, advice for increasing height and tackling thin eyebrows, but in today's modern age I would not thank anyone who gave me a book with a section on 'Home Hints' aimed exclusively at women. So I won't be reading tips on polishing boots, cleaning felt hats and zinc baths.

Are these things I ought to know? Well, not really.

The well-researched book provided an interesting insight into the norms and values of society at the beginning of the 20th century and makes a valuable contribution to the study of social history. But I would query its relevance today as a self-help book providing 'hints and tips for ladies' as it says on the cover.

Consider one extract:

Question:

Will you tell me what is the woman's part in homemaking and what the girl should expect from the man he is to marry?

Answer:

The woman is the homemaker. The man builds the house but the woman makes the home in the arrangement of th interior furnishings, in the ordering of household and by cheering influence of her presence. The woman should know how to sew, cook, to keep house and dispense hospitality. If both are willing to sacrifice for the other, the home will be a beautiful place. The wife will no doubt have worries in her first housekeeping days but she should not lose sight of the fact that her husband is having his troubles too in the business world. She should don a pretty frock for dinner each evening and see an easy chair and the papers are within easy reach of her husband. It's a little thing but it will mean a lot to him.

So while there is absolutely nothing wrong with some old-fashioned manners and respect for others, I can't said I'd be thrilled if any man handed me this book as a gift. I'd be unsure exactly of what he was telling me I ought to know.

Comments

[Stigmum]

If a man gave me this book I would probably bash him over the head with it! Though if a man gave me this book it would probably be intended as a joke (I hope!) I wish I didn't have a sieve like memory but I've managed to dig up an article, by Jane Humphries about the 1842 mines regulation act. It's about women and children working in the mines but gives an idea of what the bourgeoisie thought of women at the time (snippets from 1909/1910 that book you say?)This is what Humphries says:

" It has long been suggested that the proletarianization of wives and children strained traditional family relationships. Wage labour distracted women and children from their domestic duties and conjugal and filial responsibilites. Women's housekeeping talents collapsed, as mothers had no time to teach and daughters no time to learn. Wage labour bred a spirit of independence that was incompatible with patriachal subordination...This led not only Marx and Engels but other social commentators of the 19th century to conclude that the working class family was in decay."

It's still the same isn't it? Domestic duties are still the realm of women. (I was about to put an exclamation mark but then thought this isn't funny!)

Just thought you might find it interesting!

[Liz]

It's the kind of book that would end up in 'one's' loo. These kind of books leave me cold.

[angelsandurchinsblog]

I'd quite like the 'height' tip (unless it's just about wearing platform wedges, and I've already got that one covered).
Goodness, well, it shows how times have changed in some respects, and how little in others. And yes, Stigmum, domestic duties seem to remain the realm of women, whichever century we're in.

[gaelikaa]

Oh, Rosie, it's still the same over here. They expect you to live as an accessory to a man. I do believe that if both are willing to sacrifice for each other the home will be happy. That's it!

[peggy @ perfectly happy mum]

I got the book too and I totally agree with you. I haven't wrote my review yet but it will be very much along these lines :)

[Jo Beaufoix]

Hmmmm, there has to be someone you could give this too as a Christmas prezzie. Is there anyone you don't like very much?? ;D